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The scapegoat phenomenon in mental health is a complex issue that is often misunderstood.

In families and social groups, people often tend to place blame and responsibility for shared issues on one person, commonly known as the scapegoat.

This person typically becomes the target of criticism, rejection, and in some cases, abuse, serving as the focal point for negative attention and blame regarding the group’s dysfunction.

Such treatment can significantly impact the scapegoat’s mental well-being, often resulting in feelings of worthlessness, shame, and social isolation. In the context of mental illness, the scapegoat role can be particularly detrimental, as it may exacerbate existing symptoms and create barriers to seeking necessary help and support. The constant exposure to negative messages and blame can contribute to low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and in severe cases, post-traumatic stress disorder.

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Additionally, this situation can instill a sense of powerlessness and hopelessness in the scapegoat, hindering their ability to advocate for their own needs and overall well-being. It is crucial for both the individual experiencing scapegoating and those around them to understand the complexities of this role concerning mental illness. Recognizing the impact of scapegoating on mental health is an essential step toward addressing underlying issues and facilitating healing and recovery processes.

Scapegoating Contributes to Distracted and Confused Minds

Individuals who have been the target of scapegoating behaviors in families are in a constant state of fight or flight.

This sets up the scapegoat to constantly be uncertain about when they might be blamed and needing to justify every thought while defending each action can significantly impact behavior within families and social groups.

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Crazy making the scapegoat leaves them powerless to be confident in making decisions or knowing what direction they should take in life.

This situation can create a harmful cycle of blame and hostility, worsening the mental health challenges experienced by the scapegoat. Moreover, since the scapegoat perceives this as normal behavior, they may unconsciously seek out individuals who reinforce their belief that they are the source of all problems and responsible for others’ emotional well-being. Their actions and inability to establish boundaries, driven by a fear of being unjustly accused or punished, lead them to inadvertently teach others how they expect to be treated.

The Projection of Negative Feelings

When individuals are preoccupied with their own concerns, stressors, and insecurities, they may be more likely to project their negative feelings onto others, particularly the scapegoat. This can create a toxic cycle of blame and hostility, further exacerbating the mental health challenges faced by the scapegoat.

For instance:

  • If there’s stress and anger in the family – it’s the scapegoat’s fault
  • If there’s chaos – it’s the scapegoat’s fault
  • If someone is unhappy in the family – you guessed it. It’s the scapegoat’s fault.
  • Get the drift? If anything unpleasant happens in the family – the scapegoat is blamed.

Lack of Empathy and Understanding

Individuals who have grown up with a scapegoated sibling or family member often struggle to identify their blaming behaviors. As a result, they may fail to see how their actions affect others, including the scapegoat.

When people are consumed by their own worries and struggles, they may fail to empathize with the experiences of those around them, leading to a lack of understanding and support for the scapegoat. Taking responsibility for toxic behavior requires individuals to be responsible, and acknowledge their need to change. 

This can perpetuate feelings of isolation and alienation for the blamed individual, making it even more difficult for the scapegoat to seek help and healing. (Part of scapegoating is not being believed, and instead being accused of “making it up” just to get intention, etc.)

Breaking the Cycle

Recognizing the impact of scapegoating is essential for breaking this harmful cycle and creating a more supportive and empathetic environment for those struggling with this toxic role.

Setting Boundaries in Toxic Relationships

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Setting boundaries in toxic relationships is crucial for protecting one’s mental health and well-being, particularly for individuals in the scapegoat role. Toxic relationships are characterized by manipulation, control, and emotional abuse, which can have a devastating impact on the mental health of the scapegoat. By setting clear boundaries, individuals can establish limits on what behavior is acceptable and create a sense of safety and autonomy within the relationship.


Setting boundaries involves clearly communicating one’s needs and expectations to the other person, as well as enforcing consequences for violating those boundaries. This can be challenging, especially in relationships where there is a power imbalance or a history of abuse. However, it is essential for creating a healthier dynamic and protecting oneself from further harm.

Setting boundaries can also help the scapegoat reclaim their personal power and identity, fostering a sense of agency and self-respect. In addition to setting boundaries with others, it is also important for individuals in the scapegoat role to set boundaries with themselves. This may involve recognizing when they are taking on too much responsibility or blame, and learning to prioritize their own needs and well-being.

By setting boundaries in toxic relationships, individuals can begin to break free from the cycle of scapegoating and create a more positive and supportive environment for themselves.

Healing from the Emotional Toll of the Scapegoat Role

Healing from the emotional toll of the scapegoat role is a complex and challenging process that requires time, support, and self-reflection. The constant barrage of negative messages and blame directed at the scapegoat can lead to deep emotional wounds, including low self-esteem, shame, and feelings of worthlessness. To heal from these wounds, individuals must first acknowledge the impact of the scapegoat’s role on their mental health and well-being.

Healing from the emotional toll of the scapegoat role may involve seeking therapy or counseling to address underlying trauma and develop coping strategies for managing negative emotions. It may also involve engaging in self-care practices such as mindfulness, meditation, and exercise to promote emotional healing and resilience. Additionally, building a support network of understanding and empathetic individuals can provide validation and encouragement as individuals work through their emotional pain.

Individuals in the scapegoat role need to recognize that healing is a gradual process that takes time and patience. It may involve confronting difficult emotions and memories, as well as challenging long-held beliefs about oneself and one’s worth. However, with dedication and support, individuals can begin to heal from the emotional toll of the scapegoat role and reclaim their sense of self-worth and identity.

Reclaiming Personal Power and Identity

Reclaiming personal power and identity is an essential step in recovering from the scapegoat role in mental illness. The constant blame and criticism directed at the scapegoat can erode their sense of agency and self-worth, making it difficult to assert themselves and advocate for their own needs. Reclaiming personal power involves recognizing one’s inherent worth and taking steps to assert oneself in relationships and social dynamics.

One way to reclaim personal power is by setting boundaries with others and asserting one’s needs and expectations. This may involve communicating assertively, standing up for oneself, and refusing to accept blame or responsibility for problems that are not theirs. It may also involve seeking supportive relationships that validate one’s experiences and encourage speaking up for oneself.

Reclaiming personal power also involves cultivating a strong identity separate from the scapegoat role. This may involve exploring one’s interests, passions, and strengths, as well as challenging negative beliefs about oneself that have been internalized over time. By reclaiming personal power and identity, individuals can begin to break free from the constraints of the scapegoat role and create a more positive and empowered sense of self.

Seeking Support and Therapy for Recovery

Creating a Safe Space for Healing

Seeking support and therapy is crucial for individuals recovering from the emotional toll of the scapegoat role in mental illness. Therapy provides a safe space for individuals to explore their experiences, process difficult emotions, and develop coping strategies for managing the impact of scapegoating on their mental health. It also offers validation and support from a trained professional who can help individuals navigate their recovery journey.

Therapy Approaches for Recovery

Therapy may involve various modalities such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), or trauma-focused therapy, depending on the individual’s needs and experiences. These approaches can help individuals challenge negative thought patterns, regulate their emotions, and address underlying trauma related to the scapegoat role. Additionally, therapy can provide individuals with tools for setting boundaries, asserting themselves in relationships, and building resilience in the face of adversity.

Building a Support Network

In addition to therapy, seeking support from friends, family members, or support groups such as Circles Journey Groups, can provide valuable validation and encouragement as individuals work through their recovery process. Connecting with others who have experienced similar challenges can help individuals feel less alone in their journey and provide inspiration for healing and growth. By seeking support and therapy, individuals can begin to address the impact of the scapegoat role on their mental health and work towards reclaiming their sense of self-worth and identity.

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Moving Forward with Self-Compassion and Resilience

Moving forward with self-compassion and resilience is an important aspect of recovery from the scapegoat role in mental illness. The journey towards healing may involve setbacks, challenges, and difficult emotions that require patience, self-compassion, and perseverance. By cultivating self-compassion, individuals can learn to treat themselves with kindness and understanding as they navigate their recovery journey.

Self-compassion involves recognizing one’s own suffering without judgment or criticism, as well as offering oneself comfort and care in times of distress. It also involves challenging negative self-talk and beliefs about one’s worthiness, replacing them with more compassionate and affirming messages. By practicing self-compassion, individuals can begin to heal from the emotional toll of the scapegoat role and develop a more positive relationship with themselves.

Resilience is another important quality for moving forward from the scapegoat role in mental illness. Resilience involves adapting to adversity, bouncing back from setbacks, and finding strength in the face of challenges. Building resilience may involve developing coping strategies for managing stress, seeking out sources of support and encouragement, and cultivating a sense of purpose and meaning in life.

By moving forward with self-compassion and resilience, individuals can begin to reclaim their personal power and identity after experiencing the scapegoat role in mental illness. This journey may involve ups and downs, but with dedication and support, individuals can begin to create a more positive and empowered sense of self as they continue on their path towards healing and recovery.

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